Someone Come Get Their WIP Uncle Before He Has a Heart Attack

What an interaction at the Eagles/Commies game. This was the exact energy in the Linc for the majority of it:

A WIP Uncle spotted in the wild

(tt/westscottsdaleelite) pic.twitter.com/zGyiLlZmYf

— Crossing Broad (@CrossingBroad) November 15, 2024

This guy hates three things. Kickers missing field goals, people that tread on his First Amendment rights, and light beer-drinking assholes. This guy definitely SLAMS Sierra Nevada Pale Ales because it puts “hair on your chest” and thinks you’re a pussy if you drink anything below 4% ABV.

“What’re you Marcus Hayes? Sit the fuck down!” Where did that stray come from? It didn’t even make sense, but the bravado he delivered that insult with won me over anyway. He definitely just read about Hayes and Joel Embiid’s drama in the locker room last week and it was the only guy who covers sports in Philly that he could remember. You think the guy rocking a crimped LeSean McCoy knock-off cares about facts? He’s only able to retain information for 30 minutes at a time. It starts with Jeopardy! and then the hard drive gets wiped once Fox News comes on. He doesn’t have time to go through his rolodex of sports personalities in this city. He’s still trying to grasp the morning radio changeover from Angelo Cataldi to that Camaro guy and the fullback who played for the Eagles.

God I love this guy. Leaning on another person’s shoulder just so you can yell with your whole chest is an amazing old man move. If his family doesn’t want him at Thanksgiving I’ll gladly take him.

I need the alternate angle to see the guy he’s yelling at like I need air to breathe. If you find it hit me up.

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