Ben Simmons Looking Like Dr. Who and Flavor Flav Teamed Up to Shoot 59% from the Foul Line

Ben Simmons showed up at the Met Gala:

I’ve got a lot of questions about this. Why is Ben Simmons invited to the Met Gala? And what even is the Met Gala? Once a year your timeline fills up with photos of celebrities at some red carpet event, wearing goofy-ass clothing. Apparently it’s a fundraiser for the Metropolitan Museum of Art’s “Costume Institute” in Manhattan.

Anyway, Ben is looking like some combination of Dr. Who and Flavor Flav, just returned from battling Agent Smith inside the Matrix. Morpheus without a jump shot. Sherlock Holmes and the case of the 59% free throw shooter. The briefcase holds the deflated hopes and broken dreams of Sixers fans, while the clock indicates that it’s time to get back to physical therapy to rehabilitate the back injury. 10 reps of Call of Duty, followed by four sets of PUBG. Then it’s time to get into the lab, and by “lab” we mean someone films you you shooting uncontested three pointers in an empty gym.

One other question – why are athletes so fucking weird these days? James Harden shows up looking like Sully from Monsters Inc., if Sully was getting ready to rob a convenience store:

Pete Alonso shows up looking like whatever this is supposed to be:

And Deebo Samuel shows up looking like Wesley Snipes in Demolition Man before absolutely killing the Eagles at the Linc:

I don’t get it.

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